Eager and waiting for the proposal to pop? I can imagine your excitement. While you wait for it, these are things you must consider before saying yes to a marriage proposal. I am not married, but I have relationships with married people enough to understand how important the decision to get married is. I have observed with curiosity as some of them are happy together, while others battle unhappiness and depression every single day of their lives.
You may be waiting for your fiancé to finally go down on one knee and ask you to spend the rest of your life with him, but that is a big decision to make. Even if you do not have a fiancé yet, but hope to get married someday, this is for you.
Before you say yes to a marriage proposal, consider these eight things.
1. Do you share similar values?
Things such as culture, religion and family values, if not talked about, can cause complications in a relationship. For example, if you are not religious and you get married to someone who adores his religion, there may be some conflicts. If you drink alcohol, but your partner forbids alcohol, you may have a hard time.
When you have similar values, you are likely to understand each other and have a good time together. It reduces conflict and unnecessary disagreements.
Before you say yes to a marriage proposal, make sure your values are aligned with your partner’s.
2. Your partner must be honest
Honest people are truthful and trustworthy. If he is honest, it opens a window for trust; and trust is the key to a healthy relationship. Honest people are less likely to cheat, lie or stab you in the back. I said, they are less likely to; I did not say they are incapable of doing so. 🙂
Do not take chances and be with someone who is dishonest and constantly lies to you. If your boyfriend/fiancé is dishonest and not trustworthy, it may be time to think about your options.
Simply, do not say yes to a dishonest person.
3. He must show maturity
When I asked my married friends what they looked out for before saying yes to their partners, one thing which was common was maturity.
Maturity is described differently by different people. However, some qualities must run through. Does he handle situations like a man and not a boy? Does he exhibit leadership skills? Is he patient and understanding? Does he show depth in the things he says, and does he think before acting? All these go a long way to show how mature a person is.
Most importantly; does he encourage you to live your dreams? If you are going to spend the rest of your life with someone, they should be helping you make progress.
Related: 5 Things that are Destroying Your Relationship
6 Signs it is Time to Break Up with Him
4. Financial Stability is important
Finances are a major factor to consider when making a decision to spend the rest of your life with someone. Talking about money be uncomfortable, but it is important.
Your fiance must be financially stable; you should have a source of income too. You will need money to pay bills and take care of your home. You do not necessarily have to be rich, but you must be able to take care of your needs. Financial challenges can lead to a lot of stress in a marriage.
Before you say yes to a marriage proposal, make sure there is money to keep both of you going.
5. Are you truly in love?
Love is a word which is thrown about everywhere these days, but are you in love for real? It is important for your partner to want you as much as you want him. If the desire to be together is one-sided, you will not be happy.
Be true to yourself, do not just follow your heart, follow your mind and your instincts. Before saying yes to a marriage proposal, be sure the desire to be together is mutual and genuine.
6. Consider the 80/20 rule
What is the 80/20 rule? The 80/20 rule basically refers to a situation where you focus on the positive attributes of a person (constituting 80%) compared to their flaws (which may constitute only 20%).
Since it is impossible to meet someone who is 100% perfect, you may have 80% good attributes and 20% bad attributes in one person. Therefore, focus on the 80% good and do not only focus on the 20% of bad attributes. Check out six signs to know it is time to break up in your relationship here.
Before you say yes a marriage proposal, make sure your partner’s positive behavior is greater than his negative behavior.
7. Do you find him attractive?
Just like money, it may be uncomfortable to admit but looks are important in a relationship.
If you are not physically attracted to him, it will be difficult to appreciate him holistically. To keep your relationship exciting, you must be with someone you are proud of and admire. If you are not physically attracted to your partner, make sure you have more than enough reason to want to ignore their looks.
8. Are you ready for it?
The proposal often comes from the man, but it is important to think about your own readiness. Are you ready to be committed? Do you feel mentally and emotionally prepared? Most importantly, do you want it?
Before saying yes to a marriage proposal, think about how prepared you are to truly love, be honest, and give all the things you want to gain from the relationship. Are you financially stable; do you have a working plan?
If you answered yes to them, you are good to go.
Related: 5 Things that are Destroying Your Relationship
6 Signs it is Time to Break Up with Him
Conclusion- Should you say yes?
These are eight things you must consider before saying yes or I do. Assess how ready you are, make sure you share similar values with your partner and consider how honest, mature and financially stable he is. Both of you must truly be in love, and you should be physically attracted to him. Lastly, consider the 80/20 rule.
What are some of the things you think women must look out for before saying yes to a marriage proposal? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.
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